


finding loneliness

by pastelace (lookingmirror)



Series: all is well in hell [1]
Category: ENHYPEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Dubious Morality, Fluff, Gen, Light Angst, M/M, The God AU no one asked for, jungwon is both babie and bastard, ni-ki is just a shy baby kitten, this is soft i guess???
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:27:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27760765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lookingmirror/pseuds/pastelace
Summary: the emissary of gods meets the guardian of the underworld.(jungwon unknowingly begins courting ni-ki)
Relationships: Nishimura Riki | Ni-ki & Yang Jungwon, Nishimura Riki | Ni-ki/Yang Jungwon
Series: all is well in hell [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2030758
Comments: 18
Kudos: 81





	1. Chapter 1

The task itself was simple; deliver the God of Victory’s letter to the Master of the Underworld. Yang Jungwon couldn’t say the same for the process though.

“The God of Underworld does not accept anything from outside his realm. Leave.”

Guarding the entrance of the cave, the young man stood firm and unyielding.

Fortunately, the Emissary of Gods had always been persistent in nature, a double-edged sword many would say. “Can you at least inform him of my presence? I, Yang Jungwon, have come to deliver a message from-“

“No,” the boy cut him off curtly. “Leave.”

If it was any other God, they would’ve blasted the other into ashes. But Jungwon was known for his infinite patience or the show of it anyway.

He stared at the creature in front of him; a boy taller than him in height yet smaller in stature, skin as pale as the purest snow dotted with beauty marks, he carried the eyes of a cougar, contrasting his softer feline-like features.

It would be hard to believe that the otherwise pretty young man was a creature from the underworld, if not for the ominous chains dangling all over his body.

Jungwon held back a sigh, he didn’t have enough knowledge of the existence of the boy to gauge him as something dangerous or not.

Sending out messages was usually an easy task for him, but if it was the underworld, it becomes a different story.

No mortal nor God could easily come and go in the realm of the dead, especially not after what occurred before.

“I’ll return tomorrow.” Jungwon smiled before turning his back and retreating for the day.

* * *

Just as he promised, Jungwon returned the day after, brandishing a smile and doubling his persistence.

The unknown boy looked at him stunned for a couple of seconds before collecting his bearings.

“Nothing has changed,” the boy said. “My master doesn’t want any connection from the other Gods. Leave.”

How odd.

Jungwon cocked his head to the side, assessing the other.

A mare creature of undead holding his gaze against a divine being; he didn’t know whether he would call that courageous or brazen. Nevertheless, Jungwon found the kid interesting.

“Well, that’s too bad.” He shrugged, waving a handwritten letter held between his fingers. “To compensate for my efforts in coming here, will you give me your name?”

The boy was frozen in place, his eyes going wide as he stared at the Emissary as if he was a monster more terrifying than the horrors of hell.

“M-my name?” He nearly shrieked, taking a step backward. There was a storm inside his eyes that had lost its will to look directly at Jungwon.

The boy lowered his gaze to the ground, hands busy fidgeting with the sleeve of his robes.

Jungwon was met with dead silence, but he waited.

And waited, and waited, and waited until-

“I have no obligation to give you my name.”

He never expected it to be easy. It didn’t make it any less vexing though.

Jungwon offered the boy another one of his business smiles.

“That’s alright. I’ll be returning tomorrow.”

* * *

The third time Jungwon came back, it went down exactly the same as yesterday. So did the fourth time, the fifth, the sixth, the seventh.

The eight-day was when he’d reached his limit.

It seemed like luck was also on his side as when he entered the cave, the first thing that greeted him was the sleeping form of the guardian; his small body curled up on the very corner of the cave. It reminded him of a sleeping cat.

Jungwon wrapped the concealing cloak around him, hiding his physical body from the naked eyes. If the boy couldn’t do as much as to send his message to the God of Underworld, then he’d have to do it himself.

It wouldn’t be an ideal solution to directly see the God of Underworld. He simply had to breach the entrance, find someone he could bribe to do his bidding and that would end his tedious task.

Jungwon smiled to himself, passing by the sleeping boy. He did felt bad about it. It was like tricking an innocent child, but if it was the only solution then so be it.

Huh?

He glanced down, there, a chain was wrapped around his ankle preventing him from moving.

“Are you underestimating me?”

Jungwon whipped his head to the side. The boy had awakened, a deep frown marring his face.

Did the cloak fail?

Though, now that he thought about, there was a chance possibility that the cloak’s concealment would be nullified in this place. After all, it was the Master of Underworld himself who created it.

That was a mistake on Jungwon’s part.

“You can see me?” He asked, lowering the hood and revealing himself.

“No,” the boy answered, “but the very moment you stepped inside the cave, I became aware of your presence. You can hide your physical form but not your divine presence. You should know that by now.”

Cheeky. Jungwon accepted the criticism still.

“Then, can you release now?” He let out a small laugh, pointing at the chain still wrapped around him.

The undead being stood up only to stare him down. “What were you trying to do?”

Jungwon pressed his lips together. “Seeing if I could try and deliver the letter to the God of Underworld myself?”

The boy clenched his jaw, the edges of his eyes sharpening. “How many times do I have to tell you? He isn’t accepting anything from you or anyone else.”

“That’s a problem.” Jungwon sighed, “This task has been getting in the way of my other missions. Can’t you try convincing your master?”

“How about _you_ ask the God of Victory to give up already?”

He couldn’t help but laugh.

“Do you think I haven’t tried that yet?” the Emissary giggled a little more before shaking his head. “Hyung is even more stubborn than you.”

The taller boy was quiet after that, his gaze returning to the ground.

Nothing else could be done here, huh.

“Nevermind, I’ll just have to try again tomorrow.” Jungwon declared, lifting his foot and swinging it to rattle the chain. Surprisingly enough, the boy removed the chain without any more prompting.

“…You’re still coming?”

Uncertainty was clear in the boy’s eyes. Jungwon had long abandoned the concept of pity, but at that very moment, he had the briefest urge to take the other boy with him and away from whatever he was fighting.

Instead, he smiled, clear and empty.

“Nothing will happen if I just stand still so I might as well keep pushing, right?”

Jungwon began walking out of the cave.

“Good night, Guardian of Underworld.” He looked back and sent the boy one last smile with a quarter of genuineness, unlike the previous ones. “I’ll be back tomorrow.”

* * *

Jungwon returned to the same scene as yesterday, but this time rather than curling on himself, the guardian was sprawled on the ground. If he was being honest, he found it a little concerning.

“Isn’t it cold?” He asked as he took a step inside.

“Hyung-!” the boy gasped, sitting up abruptly. He looked around the place in a frenzy until his sight landed on the Emissary. “Y-you again…”

“Isn’t it cold?” Jungwon echoed his question, a small playful smile on his lips.

“Does the cold matter to immortals? Or to the undead, in this case…” the taller boy mumbled the last part to himself, Jungwon was able to catch it though. “Besides, it’s way colder in the Underworld anyway.”

The boy scooted closer to the wall of the cave, before pulling his knees close to his chest.

In his past encounter with the other, it was always day time. However, it seemed like once the Sun sleeps, the Guardian of the Underworld becomes drowsy as well. Jungwon muses, taking a seat beside the boy with a noticeable space between them, but even with space, the other still appeared restless, squishing his body closer to the wall as if hoping to become one with it.

“Can I ask you something?”

The guardian visibly startled. After a few seconds of complete silence, he replied with a hum.

Jungwon stared at the night sky, sprinkled with the dazzling lights of far-away stars. It was soothing. It had been a long while since he was able to let his guard down like this. And to think that he was doing this in the very entrance of the Underworld of all places. Ironic. 

“Is there any reason for him to be avoiding any contact from outside the Underworld?”

The boy released a strangled noise, Jungwon laughed.

“I-I’m not allowed to answer that!”

He tore his eyes away from the stars and looked at the undead creature beside him, stubbornly avoiding his eyes.

A bad liar.

Jungwon’s haunch might be correct after all.

“I see.” He nodded. “Do you think he resents all the other Gods?”

As expected, the other didn’t answer his question. Jungwon hummed in understanding.

“What about you? What do you think of us?”

Finally, the boy lifted his gaze and glared at him. He held the stare for a moment before looking away. “Annoying.”

Jungwon released a puff of air, trying to hold back from laughing too loudly. “You just formed that opinion based on me alone, didn’t you?”

“And what if I did?” the other grumbled, Jungwon wanted to pinch his cheeks.

“Then you’re not completely wrong.”

It was a fact no one would openly agree to, but everyone knew that the Gods could be more exasperating than humans. In the end, Gods are still humans that had been granted divinity. And that divinity drove them to vanity. 

Pathetic.

“How is it like in the underworld?”

The guardian’s eyes brightened at the question. He tilted his head to the sky. Jungwon could see the stars in the reflection of his eyes. Pretty.

“Rotten souls return to us. Pure souls return to the cycle of life. And souls that have been acknowledged by Heaven are granted immortality in the realm of Gods.” A rare smile made its way to the boy’s face, The very first Jungwon had seen. It was a mesmerizing sight to behold. “But even so, not all those rotten souls are completely bad.”

“Hyung told me that nothing can be completely good or bad. There’s always a balance to everything.”

A God so brilliant that even the stars couldn’t rival the shine in his eyes. It was as if that God’s soul was living inside the Guardian of the Underworld.

_(“Listen, Jungwon-ah. Dichotomy isn’t everything. There’s no such thing as black and white. Only you can decide that for yourself.”)_

Still the same and yet…

Jungwon swallowed the thoughts away, locking it at the very back of his mind.

“For someone who’s supposedly be guarding the underworld, you’re actually pretty responsive.” He pursed his lips together and smiled.

“Because I was taught that ignoring other people isn’t polite,” the boy said, an adorable shade of pink dusting his cheeks.

“So you’d answer even to a stranger like me?” Jungwoned tried pushing a little more. “If you’re someone who values manners, then how come you haven’t told me your name yet when you already know mine?”

The guardian’s eyes went wide, face getting redder at each passing second. He glanced at the emissary before placing his hands on his face.

Jungwon was only joking, He didn’t expect this reaction at all.

The boy removed his trembling hands from his face with great difficulty.

“M-my name,” his voice was so small that if not for Jungwon’s sensitive hearing then he wouldn’t be able to make of it at all, “is Niki.”

Niki.

Niki...

The emissary blinked. How come it felt like he’d heard that name from somewhere before?

“Nice to meet you, Niki.”

After that, total silence followed, but neither of them minded. They observed the night sky for a long time, no more words were exchanged, only the acknowledgment of each other’s presence.

Jungwon was finally able to experience tranquillity again. But that too had to come to an end.

“Well, that’s it for today.” Jungwon stood, Niki followed suit.

“Huh? But you didn’t ask for-!”

“Hm?” the Emissary tilted his head, feigning ignorance.

Niki parted his lips, but before any words could come out from him, Jungwon had laid his hand on his head, giving him a gentle pat and rendering him speechless.

“See you tomorrow, Niki.”

_And many more tomorrows._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: minor character death

Vibrant colors, fragrant air. Even the rarest gem in the world couldn’t be compared to the ethereal beauty of the garden. Yet what truly made the scene breathtaking was the radiant figure of the God of Victory standing tall in the middle of the field.

In a garden dominated by hues of purple, a lone man in yellow held a red carnation in his delicate hands.

The God of Victory was said to be a callous man, hardened by bloodshed and betrayal. Feared by everyone, and feared no one. They call upon his holy name for victory, pride, and prosperity. Clad in heavy armor, with the divine saber in one hand, he embodied strength and courage.

It was the very same God who built a thousand years' worth of patience cultivating an eternal garden of beauty that would be forever etched to his name.

If only others could see him right now; smiling unabashedly at a tiny flower on top of his palm.

Jungwon didn’t hide a laugh.

Alerted by his presence, Jongseong turned his body to look at him. “You’re back already?”

“The attendants of the God of Beauty are more handful than I expected. I wasn’t able to speak with him,” Jungwon said, walking towards the other God.

“The Celestial twins? I haven’t met any of them yet. Maybe I should pay them a visit myself.”

Jungwon merely smiled, a letter materializing in his palm. Jongseong was quick to catch on.

A month passed and the letter the God of Victory had written for the Master of the Underworld remained in the hands of the Emissary.

It came to the point that Jungwon was getting used to his everyday habit of bothering the Guardian. 

“Oh.” Years of experience allowed Jongseong not to let any of his dejection slip into his voice nor expression. Alas, the younger knew him far too long not to notice it. 

“Hyung, what are you going to do now?”

Jongseong shrugged, tucking the flower behind Jungwon’s ear. “Keep writing letters.”

Of course, he expected nothing less from the other God. Lots could change, but Jongseong’s tenacious nature would always stay intact, one of the reasons why Jungwon’s respect for him could amount to the numbers of stars.

“You never learn how to give up.” He giggled, lightly pushing away the older from him. “I’ll be taking my leave now. What do we know! I may come up with good news the next time I return here.”

Before he could take another step, Jongseong’s voice halted him.

“Jungwonie,” there existed, a hopeful grin and shine in the God’s eyes, “Do you think he’ll be delighted once he sees this?”

For a brief moment, he was taken back to the time when there used to be no empty space beside the God of Victory. Flowers weren’t flourishing, only the sound of merry-making and accompanied laughter making the space bloom with life.

A time when there wasn’t any emptiness to be filled.

“I have no answer to that, hyung.” Jungwon turned his back. “But I’ll do what I can.”

_To bring him back to you, to us._

* * *

Jungwon had taken this route so many times that he could navigate his way with his eyes closed. How amusing it was, that in his many years of existence, the place he’d be so familiarized with was the entrance of hell.

Before reaching the cave, the place was surrounded by trees. Forest, a maze made of trees, swarming with the most dangerous creatures in their realm. Anyone could get lost easily, and shameful at is it, Jungwon had his fair share of experiences before.

Nearby the cave, but hidden in view, that was when he encountered the man.

It was an immortal with the physical appearance of a middle-aged man, donned in a white robe. The man didn’t seem like he was under any deity, he must be someone who had just attained his new status, no one remarkable, Jungwon concluded.

It was odd enough that a mare immortal was trekking towards the entrance of the underworld. Jungwon would’ve assumed that the man was lost, but his eyes gave him away.

Malice and hatred.

Jungwon had seen those eyes before in the mirror, staring right back at him, taunting and mocking.

“Where are you heading to?” He asked, stepping out of the shadows and blocking the man’s path.

Upon closer look, Jungwon noticed the tattered clothing of the man with multiple bite marks spread all over his body. For a mere immortal, surviving in the bordering forest could be counted as an impressive feat.

“The Emissary!” The man’s eyes lit up in recognition. He leaped forward, unabashedly grasping Jungwon’s shoulder. “You know where the underworld is right? Take me there!”

Ah. So it was going to be like that.

“What business do you have with the underworld?” A placid smile.

“I…” The immortal’s face dimmed, his grip on Jungwon tightening. “The God of the Underworld, I must slay him…avenge my people…innocent people who perished from the foolishness of one God…”

“Avenge?” Jungwon pushed the man away, smile unwavering. “For what reason?”

An ugly expression took over the man’s face,

“My people! My family! Because of that monster he unleashed, all of them suffered!”

Jungwon loathed two kinds of people. Those who couldn’t keep their own words and those who would take anyone’s words for granted.

A chilling air enveloped the forest.

“You are no longer human. Why linger in the past?”

“You won’t understand anything! You’re an esteemed immortal living a luxurious life freed from the guilt of witnessing the torment and suffering the people in the mortal realm go through!” The man lashed out, agony in his voice, hatred in his eyes.

“You are no longer human, immortal.” The Emissary spoke, void of the fabricated warmth he always carried.

“It’s my duty, as one of them, it’s my duty to end that man’s life!”

This man, Jungwon decided, if he kept his life longer than necessary would be the laughing stock of the three worlds. People like him have no place in their realm. A person who couldn’t let go of their worldly afflictions and connections were nothing more than a wrongly empowered mortal.

If he somehow pursued the man into giving up, he’d still live his never-ending life harboring resentment that would lead him to damnation worse than eternal death. However, if fate side with the man and let him meet the God of Underworld, with no divine weapon in possession he wouldn’t be able to scratch the God. He’d die a pathetic death. Either way, the man is destined for a tragic end.

Jungwon had to do something about it otherwise his conscience would never be clear.

With a snap of his finger, a silver dagger fell into his hand.

“You…” The man’s eyes were stuck on the glinting blade in the Emissary’s hand. “What are you intending to do?”

There was no answer and slowly the stray immortal understood.

Yang Jungwon might have forgotten pity, but not mercy. Before the man could make any move, Jungwon took aim.

The man stared at him wide-eyed, stumbling backward before falling on his bottom. It was instantaneous, what once used to be a hallowed flesh was reduced to nothing but pearls of glowing lights dissipating on air.

There were only two conclusions. Unrecognized by Heaven, his soul would be forever lost. However, if his death was proven unjustified then he’d be given another chance as a mortal.

Jungwon called and the dagger returned to him, free of blood, clean of sins.

What followed next for the man is no longer of his concern.

* * *

“You’re here again?” Niki questioned, dumbfounded as he stared at Jungwon.

“Are you waiting for me?” He tried prodding for a reaction. The past few days, as weird and unbelievable as it seemed, the Guardian was slowly dropping his guard around him.

“Why would I-“ Niki’s words were caught in his throat as his eyes spotted something on Jungwon’s ear. “That’s…”

Jungwon touched the spot above his ear and remembered the flower left tucked behind his ear. He glanced at Niki and without hesitating, removed the flower and handed it to the other boy.

Niki hesitated before accepting the flower.

“It’s alive, isn’t it?” The Guardian gasped in wonder, holding it delicately. “The flowers in the underworld aren’t living or dead, simply frozen in time.”

That was unfortunate, but they had to accept it. After all, no living thing stays alive in the Underworld. It must be Niki's first time seeing a real flower.

“What do you think of the God of the Underworld?”

Niki whipped his head to the side to face him, stunned by the sudden question.

Jungwon smiled and Niki returned his gaze to the flower.

“Hyung is a good person.”

He already knew that.

“Do you have any idea how the others see him?“ Jungwon asked, taking a step forward. ”The scum of the three worlds who released the Sin of Wrath that took the innocent lives of immortals and mortals.”

“He didn’t!” Niki’ answered in an instant, clenching his fist and crushing the fragile life in his hand. A pained expression took over his features at the realization of what he had done.

Genuine confusion filled him and for a moment, Jungwon’s voice faltered. “Are you already around that time?”

“No, I’m made from the flesh of the current God of Underworld. The Retrieval of Beauty, I never saw it.”

Niki stood his ground, eyes blazing and lips turned downwards. It was the first time Jungwon saw him angry.

“But that doesn’t change anything. I still believe Heeseung hyung wasn’t the one responsible for it.”

He believed that too, but what was the point of believing when the Gods around him have already constructed their own reality. Lee Heeseung was never a completely good person, but Jungwon knew more than anyone else, that the God held a pure heart, wasn’t that the reason why they were in this predicament in the first place?

Yet, bitterness was Jungwon’s greatest enemy. He couldn’t forget, couldn't forgive.

“If you don’t know anything, then it’s better to stay silent.”

It was the first time Niki felt fury, but it was also the very first Jungwon snapped at someone who would live another day.

“And you?” Niki released his grip on the flower, letting its crushed remnants fall on the ground. “You don’t know anything either. Even if you may have known him before, you’re not the one who stayed with him. You have no right to judge him. I couldn’t care less if everyone sees him as their enemy. I’ll always believe in him because he didn’t abandon us!”

Jungwon froze as if doused with cold water. Niki’s reasoning was flawed, but that was everything to it. They were not the ones who were abandoned, they have no reason to resent and regret. Niki didn’t need to fight this fight with him, Jungwon had already lost long ago.

Consumed by bitterness, he was no different from the man before. 

Jungwon moved forward but was stopped by the Guardian’s monotonous voice.

“Leave,” Niki ordered, devoid of any emotions.

With a heavy heart, the Emissary left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the long delay!! and nope i haven't forgotten this series yet bhgvgfhcds   
> aaaa i hope u enjoyed this chapter :3

**Author's Note:**

> this will be part of a bigger series eeee ><  
> oh and for the worldbuilding! i took some inspiration from tgcf but u dont need to read it to understand!


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